Being a DJ’s Girlfriend – Advice on Dating a DJ

Guides
February 9, 2017

Should I Date A DJ?

Satire
Look we all love passionate confident men, but are all passions equal? Dating a DJ comes with benefits and sacrifices. I mean we’ve all thought about it, but how can we manage? It’s a tough balance but if you pull it off your relationship will be rock solid. The biggest issue is finding the perfect resonance between you, his fans and his mixes. If you can handle a DJ you can handle any man’s childish dreams.



Being a DJ’s Girlfriend

He’s deadset on his “craft” and he’s looking to you for support. A DJ’s girlfriend needs to take special care to navigate the relationship on a tight rope. Just like mixing the perfect beat you have to find the right balance. On one hand you can’t enable him but on the other you can’t destroy his dreams. You’re not that mean right? With this handy guide you can be consenting without approving and we can hope he gets the hint and a real job.

Handy Dating Advice

You have to start the relationship off right. When you meet a DJ, the first thing they will tell you is probably something along the lines of, “I’m a DJ”. This behaviour is twofold and focuses on your reaction. First it’s a warning, “Hey I’m a DJ, and if you’re not cool with that, run away”. If you continue interacting with him, he’s no longer morally responsible. Second, it’s to check and see if you’re an open and accepting soul that will let him follow his dreams without hurting his core. He needs this subtle approval. He’s already pumping his ego by claiming he’s an artist, that’s enough of that. From this point on the game is afoot. Remember the balance. Consent without approval. Try acknowledging through a slight nod and a vocal “oh”, or maybe even a barely intrigued “hmm”.  Set the rules from the start.

The tests come strong and fast however, the next one will come up when you try to find out his name! DJ’s create stage names to dissociate from their issues and escape the emotional pain. Try to find out his real name and not his stage name as soon as possible. If you’re having real trouble, just say he can’t be whatever age he is and get him to show you his ID to “prove it”. Try to never use his DJ name. Never. Sorry Em-RK, you’re just Mark to me. If he asks you to use it when referring to him; avoid patronizing questions like “Umm why…?” Remember don’t stomp on his dreams, just subtlety let him know you don’t respect his life choices at all.

concert

When you hang out at his place you have to totally ignore his gear. Look it’s obvious he spent way too much on that DJ controller. But it’s his baby. Just pretend it doesn’t exist, don’t touch it and definitely don’t ask questions about it. This is the first step in finding a harmonious relationship. There are certain mental anchors a DJ has and avoiding them is the best form of defense. When he wants you to listen to a mix he made, pat him on the back and say, “It’s fine”. You can’t hit his dreams in the dick with a frozen sledge hammer, that’s cruel. Don’t white lie though, as the ego will snowball if you say something like, “That’s pretty good Em-RK.”

Make up excuses for avoiding shows as much as possible. But if you have to go to you DJ boyfriend’s performance you need a plan. The best way to handle this is to be a wallflower in the corner. Play on your cell, avoid eye contact with horny teens and stay away from the DJ booth.

Dating a DJ is Hard

If you find yourself having difficulties making the relationship work. The nicest and most caring thing you can do for your DJ boyfriend is dump him. He’s busy and going places and you’re definitely holding him back. Let him focus on his dreams. When you break the news remind him “It’s not him, it’s you” or something.



 

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